I’m going to describe a social-gathering fail. We’ve all seen it on TV, or read about it in various media. See if you can guess where this occurs:

People from various walks of life gather to finally relax with a few drinks after an arduous day. Some still wear dust on their clothes from their respective trails.

Settling in, a distinctive buzz fills the room as they mingle. Some enjoy music while others enjoy the conversation. Liquor starts to flow, and flirting begins with the prettiest female attendants. They dress provocatively, as is custom for the establishment.

Remember the question what do you want to be when you grow up?

For boys, it was typically a fireman, policeman, astronaut, or maybe even a cowboy. All of those were worthy callings.

But did anyone list international jewel thief? I’m sort of embarrassed to admit that it was high on my list.

I’d seen my share of heist movies at that time, and there was something thrilling about cutting glass and disabling an alarm system to gain entry. Or cracking a safe before guards made their rounds. Or dangling from a high ceiling to steal priceless valuables in some museum. I’d see these men attempting these daring exploits, and I thought: cool!

Oh, this modern age. You can’t do anything without being held hostage to an advertisement.

Back in the day, when there were just three TV stations, you would watch your favorite hour-long dramas and get more than 50 minutes of actual show. At that time, one’s “free TV” entertainment was solely funded by commercials. The only reason a show was on was to get you to watch the commercials and thus be inspired to part with your hard-earned cash for a detergent that was Stronger Than Dirt!